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Help is your Friend

I want to bring to light something that everyone should think about. We all know that helping people is rewarding. It is a win-win situation because two or more people are combining their energies for a greater good. But what happens when you try to help someone and they don't accept your offer? How does that make you feel?

Most of us feel the need to assert our independence day after day, sporting bull horns and blowing black smoke through our nostrils of self sufficient willpower. If someone offers to help you out - as simple as taking your groceries out to your car - and you reject the offer without a second thought, refusal becomes habit and a closed off vibration will grow bigger and bigger. Then you become one of those people who complain,

"How come nobody ever helps me?"

The unconscious attempt to close yourself off from human help catapults messages to the Universe to halt the flow of help offerings until you are ready to receive. The frequency of help offerings will wane because you snowballed yourself into a lonely black hole.

What are you trying to prove to yourself by not accepting help?

I have always been the little girl trying to prove to the world how BIG, tough and independent I am.

"I can stand on my own. Nobody can touch me. I don't need assistance. What a sign of weakness."

I have unintentionally hurt people's feelings by not accepting help. My ego and pride get in the way of graciously accepting another human being's willingness to connect. Energetically, I walk around with my arms up forming a big X to make people keep a safe distance. When you take offense to an offer of help because you fear your independence and macho image will be jeopardized, think again.

You are likely hurting yourself by keeping others at a distance.

I will always be an independent woman because that is my nature, but it is human nature to offer help. Shouldn't we then accept help? I often live toward the Independent Extreme. My challenge is to find a balance of being independent, yet open and vulnerable enough to acquiesce to assistance. I want to offer this same challenge to you.

Do you accept the challenge?

I know what you're thinking. Maybe you really don't need help or would simply rather do it yourself. Think about the other person too. Even if it is just their 'job' to help you out, deep down, they really do want to help. Give them the benefit of the doubt. By crossing your arms and being the hoity toity King or Queen of your own kingdom, you are doing yourself and the other person a disservice. People will stop trying to help you because that's what you want. But if you begin to welcome help offerings with open arms, big surprises are in store for you.

The next time someone offers to help you - whether it be with a mundane daily chore or a life altering decision - think twice, get off your high horse and be nice enough to show the other person they too are valued. After all, we can't get through life alone.